There are some transfer sagas that are fascinating, that get you hooked on every twist and turn desperately awaiting the dramatic conclusion. But there are others which are so long drawn out they become tiresome and irritating.

Ashley Cole’s inevitable move to Chelsea falls most definitely into the latter category. For over a year now we have had to listen to the moaning of Cole, the tut-tutting of Wenger and gentle cooing of Mourinho.

Just get on with it already!

We all know that Ashley wants to leave Arsenal. He has wanted to move ever since he realised he could double his money over at Chelski.

We all know that Wenger has given up on keeping a player who now believes the Highbury powers have betrayed him. And we all know that Mourinho will sign him to become his first choice left back.

So what in the name of all that is holy are they all waiting for? Why don’t they all just get on with it and let the media start focusing on something that is even vaguely interesting to the rest of us?

The only complication that I can see is a last minute official expression of interest from Real Madrid. But with Roberto Carlos pledging to stay with the Spanish giants I can’t see that developing any further.

By the time the new season kicks off the little England defender will be part of the Roman revolution over at Stamford Bridge. You can put your house on it.

So for goodness sake sign on the dotted line Ashley and put us out of our misery.

Michael Carrick

Am I the only one who thinks Michael Carrick is ridiculously over-priced?

He is a good player, a fantastic passer of the ball, solid in a holding role and young enough to develop into a real quality midfielder.

But at 18.6 million sterling I think Manchester United have paid about twice as much as they should have done for the Spurs star.

Maybe Sir Alex sees a defensive midfielder as the final piece in his jigsaw, which is why he was so desperate to sign him.

But I am sure if he had shopped around he could have found somebody else of comparable standards for a much more reasonable price.

Time will tell, I suppose, whether this is a desperate last ditch attempt by Fergie to replace Roy Keane or a properly calculated signing with long-term benefits for the club.

At the moment it looks very much like the former.

Gascoigne’s biography

I have just started reading Paul Gascoigne’s new biography which is entitled, somewhat unimaginatively, Being Gaza.

Unlike his previous book which concentrated on his football career, this one focuses on the darker side of his life – his addiction to alcohol, his frequent treatment for depression and his obsessive compulsive disorder.

For example, at one stage, after kicking his alcohol habit he became addicted to Red Bull and was drinking up to 15 bottles a day. Later, after two ‘dry’ years he took some cough medicine which contained alcohol and, after he found out, decided that was a good enough excuse to start drinking properly again.

When you watch someone like Gaza on the pitch you have no idea what sort of life he is leading behind the scenes and this book is, quite frankly, a real eye opener.

Anyone who feels footballers have it easy should pick up a copy of this book and see what sort of pressures they face.

It’s a thoroughly enthralling read.

Michael Schumacher

Anybody who wrote off Michael Schumacher as a has-been at the beginning of the season must be feeling pretty darned silly now.

Many so-called experts were saying the legendary driver had lost his edge and that his passion for victory had been eroded by years of success combined with an uncompetitive car.

But the doubts over his ambition, not to mention the state of the car, only seem to have served to spur him on and Sunday’s victory in his home race has thrown the title race wide open.

Champion Alonso is now only 11 points ahead of the German with six races to go – a margin that has been gradually reduced over the past couple of months.

And, more importantly, it reinforces the theory that while Renault are losing ground, Ferrari are improving with every passing race.

If nothing else, the rebirth of Schumacher and Ferrari has made this one of the most entertaining Formula 1 seasons in years.

Just what the sport needed.

Cristiano Ronaldo

Nobody dislikes Ronaldo more than me. I think the dirty little winker was an embarrassment to football with his antics at the World Cup and I would love nothing more than to see the smarmy grin wiped off his turtle-shaped face.

But, let’s keep things in perspective shall we. It is Ronaldo that deserves the criticism, not his family. And the operative word is criticism, not violence.

The player returned for training this week at Manchester United but apparently ordered his family to stay back home in Portugal as there are fears over their safety.

Apparently they have received threats and his house has been vandalised since the famous incident with Rooney.

And that, I am afraid, is totally out of order. There is no way he was ever going to get away with what he did in the eyes of English supporters, but the abuse should stop at chanting, booing and singing.

If it crosses the line into actual threats and even violence then those carrying out these actions are lowering themselves to a level even Ronaldo would shun.

There is no need to sink that low. I am pretty sure English fans will be able to show their feelings and let the player know just how despicable his actions where from the stands.

If it goes any further than that he will be turned from villain to victim… and that would be more than a little unfair.

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