Last week, figures published by the National Office of Statistics revealed that... hey, wait: where are you all going? I know I used the word “statistics”, but that’s no reason to go and do a GWU port workers section on me, now is it?
Anyway, as I was saying before I so rudely interrupted myself: the statistics were all about the theatre, and revealed that, of all the genres known to drama, the most popular in Malta by far is comedy.
Surprised? I’m not. I mean, just look at a few of the farces we’ve had thrown at us in the last few weeks:
Honey, I Shrunk The Union
After the runaway success of their debut, Strife Is Beautiful, veteran stooges Tony Zarb and Geitu Mercieca have once again teamed up to bring you this hilarious sci-fi sequel.
In the course of an experiment in 1970s militancy, the General Wookies’ Union (GWU) belatedly realises that it is no longer the 1970s, and that there is precious little to be militant about any more. So, with nobody to declare war on, they make the predictable mistake of turning their guns on their own members instead. The result? An entire section comes to the conclusion that “issa” really is “daqshekk”, and the country’s largest union is reduced overnight to a sorry, self-inflicted mess of internecine squabbling, mass walk-outs and bleating excuses.
Tagline: “Size doesn’t matter” Cert UPG (Union Portworkers? Gone!)
There’s Something About MTA: In a desperate bid to attract more visitors to Malta, The Malta Terrorism Authority (MTA) pays a foreign consultant some Lm30,000 a month to come up with a branding strategy, complete with original logo.
Did I say original logo? Yes indeed! So original, that it is all-but identical to the one chosen by Air Malta way back in 1973 (without, one might add, the advice of any foreign consultants).
Trivia: This is actually a sequel to Take the Money And Retire: a hilarious parody of the popular Mission Accomplished series, starring Romwald Lungaro Mifsud.
Note: Users who enjoyed this movie also recommend Carry On Carrying On, by Francis Ford Dimech.)
Cert: “U” (“...are the Brand.”)
Meet The Politicians
A delightful romantic comedy, in which a political party flirts outrageously with the electorate by holding endless “consultation meetings” on any issue affecting a particular locality.
During these meetings, the politicians (all played by utter amateurs, by the way) listen patiently to the electorate’s complaints, nodding sympathetically at each individual suggestion, and then solemnly promise to take everything into consideration before any decision is taken. But once the meeting is over, they simply go ahead and do exactly what they had originally planned to do in the first place.
But hey! What are you ungrateful citizens complaining about? At least they “consulted” you before building that five star mega-tourism complex, complete with heliport and multi-storey carpark, right on your doorstep...
Trivia: This movie is often confused with another called Meet the Fockers. Personally, I have no idea why...
Forthcoming releases:
Silent Movie: Mockumentary about the MLP’s policies on all major issues, from pensions (silence), to hunting (silence), to the water and electricity surcharge (silence), to the cost of living (silence), to immigration (silence), to divorce (silence), etc.
South Plan – Bigger, Longer, Uncut: The Malta Environmental Pain in the Abdomen (Mepa) announces extensions to the development zones, and... Oh my God, they’ve killed the environment.