Imagine this scenario.

You have been close to someone for many years. You have made sacrifices for that person. You have offered a shoulder for him or her to cry on. You have always been there to lend a helping hand in time of need. You have gone out of your way to buy things, maybe a book or a few DVDs, which you know will make him or her happy. You have opened your heart at a level that you did not know existed before. And you have listened to that person bare his or her soul to you, without judging him or her, and always offering a kind word or support.

In other words, you have been a true friend.

But then, one fine day, this friend betrays your trust. You are let down. What you thought was a strong relationship fizzles out overnight. What you thought was an unassailable friendship dies abruptly. You realise you have been used, and probably abused too. Your almost daily contact with that person is now a deafening silence. In a world of Facebook and easy communication, all the links are suddenly dead. You understand that although you never expected something in return, the person you made sacrifices for is now simply laughing behind your back. At your expense. And now you are the one who needs a shoulder to cry on.

Each and every one of us has a story of a betrayal to tell, because each and every one of us, in more ways than one, has been betrayed by someone else. Young children feel betrayed when their best friend suddenly prefers someone else on the school playground. And, as we grow older, the betrayals become more serious and leave a deeper scar in our soul. It’s even worse when you forgive a person who has betrayed you, and fall into the trap of rebuilding that trust, only to be betrayed a second time.

Some of us never get over it, and find it hard, if not impossible, to trust again once they’ve been betrayed. That relationship which has gone sour is too much for some to overcome. The bitterness and pain is sometimes transformed into hatred. We are told to forgive and forget, again, but we are consumed by an ill-feeling and perhaps start planning our revenge too.

It is in human nature to want to pay that person back. You believe that vengeance is the reaction you should have in these circumstances. You want the person who betrayed you to hurt as much as you did. And you want to see that suffering too. It’s not enough for you to know that you have settled the score. The ultimate satisfaction is that you see that person in the gutter with your own eyes.

Jesus Christ did not react in this way.

Jesus Christ was betrayed by one of the 12 men he trusted the most. Judas Iscariot handed him over to his enemies with a kiss, a symbol of love. That kiss was the start of Jesus’ long night, during which he was tortured before he was nailed to a Cross. And, from that Cross, Jesus Christ forgave all those who had hurt him.

It is only by forgiving that, just like Jesus Christ was resurrected from the dead, we could learn to live again, at peace with ourselves and with others.

Of course, it is much easier said than done. Our human weakness pushes us towards the road of retribution, which is on the whole the easier way out.

It is much harder to forgive and forget, and it’s worth a try. Whether you succeed or not is only up to you.