In the debate that is going on about divorce, a new and extremely lame argument has surfaced: “The children’s right to live with their natural parents.” Whoever has suggested that children should not be allowed to live with their “natural” parents? I ask the author of this argument, or excuse, how can children live with their natural parents when their parents are living miles, if not thousands of miles, away from each other? Is the author of this argument suggesting that if the children are just living with their mother, or with their father, then their parents have no right to start a new relationship with another man or woman, be it cohabitation or marriage, once this marriage ceased to exist years ago? What other excuse will be brought when there are no longer any children living with the mother or father?
The question of divorce has nothing to with the right of children to live with their “natural” parents. Divorce comes in years after a marriage would have broken down completely. So children will no longer be living with both their “natural” parents, but either with the mother or father. Sometimes with their grandparents! Still, the trauma of those children, when the marriage of their parents started to break down, often disappears or diminishes substantially when the parent they are living with starts a new relationship where love and respect are quite evident to the children. Hence, harmony returns to that household where previously bedlam or much worse, reigned!
Has the author of that lame argument never heard of the love which “foster parents” give to the children they accept to care for? Those children will not be living with their “natural” parents. But still, many of those children consider their foster parents as their second mother and father! The same often happens with children of a broken marriage when the parent they are living with starts a new loving relationship in cohabitation. With divorce, that relationship will be able to change to marriage. Which would give a much stable life, not only to the couple but also to the children, if there are any.
Eddy Privitera
MOSTA