Children need homes that guarantee unconditional love and protection. Love gives children the stability and peace of mind that they need. These vulnerable, helpless little children who are not capable to look after themselves, need to know and feel that their basic needs are met. They need to see food on the table when they come back home from school. They need to see their clothes clean and neatly put in the chest of drawers or wardrobe ready to wear. They need to see that smile and feel that big hug and hear those three little words “I love you”. In times of trouble children need to know and feel who they can turn to and that someone will always be there for them, to help and support them.

These guarantees of security and unconditional love can come from the children’s natural parents, foster parents, adoptive parents or from the many people who dedicate their life parenting in some children home / institutions.

From my own experience, I very well know that as long as the children’s basic needs are met, which are the guarantees of unconditional love and protection, the children don’t give a monkey’s as to who give them these guarantees.

When children are loved and protected, they will grow into strong, respectful, self-confident and reliable adults. They learn to live a healthy lifestyle, they will learn to make good choices in their life and will lead a normal, prosperous and successful life. They will build healthy relationships and form strong family ties as they pass on the love and protection they have received as children, and so the legacy of love and unity is passed from one generation to another!

The children will only suffer when they know and feel that their basic needs are not met. An unloved child will feel neglected and not wanted. They will feel unworthy of love and will grow as disturbed individuals. They will be unable to cope with the necessities of everyday life. They will not be able to manage their life or handle situations wisely. They are wounded and hurt, and the worst part is that they may think it is their fault. The lack of the children’s basic needs can come from people who are supposedly caring for children but are careless and selfish. Among whom one can find some of the children’s natural parents, foster parents, adoptive parents or some of those people where children are under their care in some children homes or institutions.

I hope that those campaigning about this divorce issue will stop using children and will stop scaring people about the suffering of the children.

In or out of marriage all that children need is to be loved, to feel loved.

■ Peter Grima

Sliema