Next Sunday is Mothering Sunday (Mother’s Day) and mums all over Malta and Gozo can expect that phone call, that card bearing flowers or maybe even be treated to a meal or gift. It is a day to remember the unconditional love and protection that mothers, past and present, have given their children. A popular Jewish proverb says “God could not be everywhere and therefore he created mothers”!
The role of mothers has certainly changed over the years. Traditionally, a mother was expected to confine her energies to raising children and being a good wife. In some societies she was also expected to look after the older generation, further cementing her role as primary carer. Fast-forward to present day and mothers are still performing these tasks but their role in society has changed incredibly. A quick glance at the past one hundred years or so will show that mothers have always been extremely resourceful and wise when it comes to looking after and providing for their families. Even in difficult economic times, mums would toil the fields, take in extra work at home like sewing, cooking and ironing, and generally do their best to ensure that the family was getting by. Although it was unheard of for a woman to work outside the home, most mums cleverly managed to do what today would be called part-time work or flexi-work. It is a tribute to these mothers that in time of crisis they succeeded in managing a work-family balance long before the term was even coined!
Today’s young mum certainly has her work cut out for her. After years of struggling to ensure that female representation is present in a large range of sectors, a highly encouraging percentage of young women are entering the workforce armed with a variety of tertiary degrees that will get them well salaried jobs. This shift has placed the role of the woman in a valuable contributory position to the island’s economy. It is a change that women will not forfeit easily as they have grasped the changing roles required of them and in certain cases have even taken on the role of primary breadwinner.
Of course some things never change, as there is an age bracket where these same women will still have a precious reproductive role, one that will see them face huge changes and decisions as they experience the transition from successful employee/employer to caring for a newborn. The sudden shift in roles is further compounded a few weeks or months later when the young mums try to go back to their careers and jobs and realise that handling that work-family balance is not as easy as it looks!
Mums certainly have their work cut out for them today and, despite the huge support systems, it is still a struggle to fulfil the multi-roles expected from back to work mums. Happily though, young mums are armed with a number of natural assets like energy, patience, enthusiasm, love and endurance, which help them through the tricky times of early morning pre-school tantrums when an important work meeting is starting in half an hour!!
Researchers have found that working mothers have better mental health and tended to build healthier relationships within the family. The economic boost to the household income helps the family’s development and, all in all, a child’s mental and social development does not suffer from mum going back to work. Of course, returning to work is a personal decision and stay at home mums have the undoubted privilege of being able to dedicate more time to their primary role as a mother. Regardless of which category a mum fits into, stay at home or work outside home, there is no running from the fact that beds have to be made and grubby football kits washed, irrelevant of whether you are revered in the board room or not!
And so, on Mother’s Day today week, spare more than a thought for your mother since chances are that the love and attention she so unselfishly gave you came at a personal cost and sacrifice. Spare also a thought for all women who although not biological mothers took upon themselves this role of giving and caring. Send up a prayer for all departed mothers and grandmothers whose precious central role in families can be felt to this very day.
Last but definitely not least, I would like to send a message of love and appreciation to my mother Amy and thank her for standing by me through thick and thin! Mum’s the word!
[email protected]