My grandfather Salvu was parsimonious with words.
His greatest joy was to see his sons, daughters and grandchildren gathered together and talking animatedly while he checked that everyone had a drink and something to eat. He would always refuse a “no, thank you” and kept insisting until he saw everyone with a glass in his or her hand.
When he did speak, he did not do so just to say something, and some of the things he said are still etched in my mind, although he’s been dead for 17 years.
Since he wasn’t one to complain much either, one day I was taken aback when he let escape that he had become “too old for this world”. He was still in good health when he said these words, and the collective reaction – apart from me – was to belittle his feelings. Perhaps he was hurt by what the response had been. If he was, he never showed it.
I remember trying to shush those who were trying to tell him that he should not be having such thoughts. I could see the conviction with which he had expressed himself. I was still a teenager then, and I could not fully comprehend the philosophy behind his remark. Nevertheless, I immediately realised that it carried a deep meaning, one I was to grasp many years later.
Today, I do understand; and these days those few words keep reverberating in my mind.
When my grandpa said them the world was moving at a much slower pace, and yet he was already thinking that it had changed so much from the world in which he had grown up, and he no longer felt he had a place there.
Today, the world is moving much faster. The globalisation phenomenon is overwhelming and so much progress has been achieved in a relatively short time. This progress may have made life easier, but it has also led to a regression of values, a lack of understanding of others and a reduction in quality time.
My grandfather was lost when he saw us with our walkmen, Rubik cubes and Space Invaders games. I just wonder how he would feel if he could see us now with our iPads, laptops and smartphones.
I, for one, am at a loss each time a new gadget comes on the market. I cannot understand the excitement shown by colleagues and acquaintances. When they start talking about touch-screens and androids I close my ears, grab my years-old Blackberry and pray it lasts forever. Actually, I was surprised at myself when I took to Windows 8 on my new laptop like a duck takes to water, but perhaps they made it simple for people like me.
Advancement in technology has helped to alter our lifestyles and make them more hectic and stressful. It is ironic that improvement in communications has made these same interactions more impersonal. It’s always more convenient to send an email than make a phone call, and it’s always better to make a phone call than meet in person. Today, people meet and talk on Facebook, not face to face.
More than this, we are now working when we are supposed to be enjoying leisure time. We are never disconnected from the rest of the world. We may be enjoying a football game on TV or a meal in a restaurant, but our mind is on the next bleep on our mobile phone to tell us that an email has been received. Some of us may even choose to reply there and then. We’re on holiday abroad but roaming facilities and wi-fi connections allow us to stay in touch, and we never really relax to the full.
But it’s not only technology that has changed. It is the change in human behaviour that is most worrying. Human nature being what it is, bad things have happened since the first step in its evolution took place, but we have come to a point where evil always wins.
We are told that humans are inherently good, but I have come to have serious doubts about this.
The more I live, the more I grow cynical about the world in which we are living and the more I lose faith in the human race.
The more I live, the more I see that negative traits in humans supersede the positive ones.
The more I live, the more I want to be on my own rather than with others.
Maybe it’s because I cannot understand why people who have everything still want more at the expense of the rest. Or because people who do a world of good are ostracised while others who are corrupt and manipulative get away scot-free.
It’s perhaps because those who are committed get the blame for the slightest of errors while the bigger issues are ignored. Or because people are out to trample upon others just to be able to get what they want.
Maybe I’ve been involved in news for too long. Maybe it’s because the stories I get to know about – which can never be printed – are taking their toll on my sensitive nature. Stories of hate, undercurrents, backstabbing, alliances of convenience and unscrupulous ambition – even among those who are supposed to be working towards the same goal – have become the order of the day.
It’s not only in politics, with which I come face-to-face during the course of my duties. Such unworthy behaviour takes place on a regular basis in all kinds of relationships, and this has been happening for so long that I have forgotten what the word ‘trust’ means.
Yes, now I know what my grandpa meant when he said that he was too old for this world. The saddest part is that he said them when he was much older than I am now.
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