I will tell you all about Pebbles in a moment! Let’s start from the very essence of being human.
I think that life at times or should I say very often, ‘gives us’ lemons and you know how it goes to end - it’s a question of what we do with those lemons! I believe that if we want to give relevance to our existence and squeeze the juice out of the lemons we need to explore incessantly what is the best way to do that. I think that my prescription in this regard is pretty straight-forward; meet and talk with people, live the narratives with them, share thoughts, experiences and feelings and the process of healing will kick-in. The second you link up with others is the instant when you become a better being, try it.
While I’m no emissary of doom and gloom and neither do I have nostalgia of ‘what was’, we do need to call' em as you see' em. I’m referring to the fact that people are losing this sense of community and it is increasingly difficult to engage. This is dodgy, because humans live in groups for a purpose. As a matter of fact, it is becoming even more tricky to get away from the craziness we are encircled by; insurmountable work targets, near impossible objectives we place on ourselves and all of this amidst the hullabaloo that has taken over our everyday life.
To bring you up to speed on what I am thinking I would like to mention a movie I am sure that most of you would have watched, the distinguished film of the legendary actor Robin Williams, Patch Adams. When the protagonist, Patch, who was a medical student wanted to show that people are longing to connect and it is our job as human beings to use simple gestures like eye contact and touch to pull down the draw-bridge and allow people in. So there is no need to reinvent the wheel. If we want to be better persons, if we covet communities, if we wish for peace with ourselves and others, the medicine is simple – capture as many emotions and experiences with others as possible – and that is what I try to do and will share in this column!
Now I consider myself lucky in this sense because even though I don’t have a gregarious personality, my work gets me in close proximity to countless narratives and the prospect of relating to so many fills my heart to the brim. In all of this, the bonus is that in these encounters you get schooling on how ‘to tackle life’.
Like most beautiful things in life, they happen by chance.
Last week I met this gentleman, very small in stature, stocky, sturdy, a beer belly but with a character of immense greatness and sense of humor. His face is one big smile even though it shows he has worked hard and had to endure tough weather conditions. The creases on his face, the inexactness of his skin, the strong hands, determined walk and efficient way of explaining what he does in his life showed that even though seasoned, tested and hardened this did not weather his soul. He is a typically self-thought gentleman, with an emotional, naturalist and inter-personal intelligence of a gargantuan scale. He doesn’t see what others do and replicates, but he observes and then creates – brilliant, absolutely marvelous!
He told me about his eventful life in the two hours I spent with him on his little farm. He said that he had worked in Libya in the oil industry when going to work meant that he wouldn’t see his family for a lengthy period of time. He talked about his feelings of anxiety and unease knowing that his kids were going through new experiences that he couldn’t share, thriving hard to make contact with the simple things that defined the love he had towards his family.
He told me all about the setting up of his construction company in tandem with his siblings and at the same time delving into the leisure industry where he started his own bars which he ran with his family - endless hours of work.
This is the typical Maltese some would say, unfussy, straightforward man who works from morning till night with the fear of God and the love of his family that give him the strength to carry on. Whilst we talked he never, for a single moment whimpered. So in-between talking about his favorite dish (Spaghetti Bolognese, which he loves doing himself), his love for his family especially his wife, three children and nephews and nieces he told me all about purchasing cranes, working in the heat, travelling to Libya - all experiences that made him.
What is enjoyable about this chap is that he captured the moment, he understood the signs of the times and translated them into action. This Country is built on people like this gentleman, people who keep a low profile, men and women who have drawn blood to make certain that they take a step forward and carry others with them – generosity of the proper type, unconditional.
Speaking with him was an amazing experience because he brought me in touch with the good that lies around us. As I said he doesn’t whine or grumble, but gets on with it. His focus was and still is his family. Doing well for himself means doing well for those he is devoted to and for those he works with.
The added beauty of meeting this 71 year old man was that he hosted me on his farm. As he fed the animals with besotted routine and got about sorting the chaos that came as a result of the wind and rain that struck on that day we talked about all at the same time. What hit as we chattered, is that no animal is more equal than other. They all got what they deserve and what they need. I was so fascinated with the sense of justice that this man exhales – no favourites, just giving to all as they merit.
Now this little farm is like a small haven.
I must say that I hadn’t been to one for some time. This beautiful place is enveloped in-between a lovely view of a valley adorned with giant stones and the smell of rock as the heat sizzled on them, the peaceful rustle of trees and shrubs as they are hit by the breeze and the sound of the pump drawing water – immaculate!
The peacefulness this place oozes and trickles is startling and marvelous and truly miraculous especially if your mind is wondering and anxious. It felt like going into a little sanctuary, a refuge and a shelter. The relationship this man has with this environment is mind-blowing. His face was alight as soon as he opened the makeshift gate leading down to the field heading to the farm.
The place touches you because even though it’s a relatively small space there are sheds, crates, hangers, haystacks and storage places so that you can find all that is needed for the sheep, chickens, pigs, roosters, donkey, horse, pheasants and other fowl that resided there. Everything has its place, all is organized and adjacently a large field with the potential to grow crops, fruit, vegetables and cereals.
But back to the animals.
The relationship that this man has with his animals is incredible. He knows them almost personally and he understands their needs. He caters for all their requirements. But the leading lights on the farm are his two dogs, Hera and Zeus, two sleek, shiny brown dogs known as tal-fenek. Beautiful eyes, lovely attitude, cuddly, affectionate and adoring. I fell in love with them. The sweetness of Hera and Zeus is exquisite.
No I haven’t forgotten Pebbles, will soon bring her into this column!
Within this scenario, as I rested my elbows on the rubble wall forgetting all about the afternoon heat (the beer came in handy here) with the field in the background this man talked about his life as if everything came easy for him, which I know for a fact it didn’t.
What I felt was that the farm brings it all together and it gives a clear understanding of this man; his fairness, his gentleness, his sturdy decisive look, his long term planning, his organizational skills, his reflexivity, his willingness to find solutions, his industriousness, his care - are all symptomatic of what urged this man to go forward in life. The work he has done, the fields he has ploughed, the animals he has cared for are a sign of the greatness that come with his ease and candor.
Oh and Pebbles.
Well the community of animals that live on the farm also include a little mountain goat, Pebbles and what a darling it is.
Small in size for sure but with such a spirit. She is the little princess of the farm, the dodgy one at times, with a desire to live and play like no other.
You see this man, who had so many challenges in life, who had to face insurmountable contests smiling at little Pebbles holding and caressing her as if she was his own flesh. This little mountain goat is capable of climbing up walls with speed and agility, reacts fast and with so much intelligence, independence but savoring the care and attention as she craves for adventure.
I noticed that Pebbles is continually on the go - an explorer in many ways. She pokes her little nose in every corner and tries to give it meaning. Pebbles puts a smile on your face and is as clear-cut as they come. She is likeable and beautiful and generated in me a sense of cheerfulness and buoyancy. Her small size and her funny gait transmitted calmness. She brings a smile on your face even in the way she looks with her deep-seated almond eyes of unbounded intensity.
Pebbles reminds ‘you’ that that there is always something good round the corner and the sun will always shine even if it sets every day with an obsessive routine. I’m only disappointed not to have seen Pebbles with the moon in the background - she must look beautiful standing tall in the night. The curiosity and willingness to look forward and never dwell on the past was something that little Pebbles, with her sweet attitude kept reminding me.
Pebbles embodies this experience I had with this gentleman reminding me that life is about taking it bit-by-bit and enjoying the moment.
This vibrant freedom I experienced with this gentleman I met to write this Column is remarkable. This man in his righteousness has thought me that life is a challenge but a lovely one indeed. It’s only when you keep going back to your roots, connecting with nature, being good with others that you understand the force that lies in you and that yes you will make it through notwithstanding the obstacles .