Being single frightens some. Others embrace singlehood gladly.  Some people badly want to be in a relationship because they are afraid of loneliness. Others say being single was the most productive period of their life. We asked three people what they think. Here's what they said.

Walter, 37 years old, never married

"Relationships and I are miles apart. I tried hard to fit into the stereotyped role expected by the good, normal male, but I never managed to keep up a relationship for more than a year.  My idea of living is all related to exploring, discovering new things, meeting new people.  Being in a relationship restricts all this because all you want to discover you have to share with your other half. I have been an independent soul since I was a child.  Some might describe me as strange, but I consider myself more of an introvert. 

"Whether I miss having a female companion or not, I might say that really I am not bothered.  I have many friends, with whom I meet up or travel. Having sex is not that difficult, either.  Nowadays it is easy to find a woman willing to do it without any strings attached. So why bother engaging in a relationship where she expects you to message, call and post statuses continuously, every hour of the day? Whenever I meet a girl whom I like, I immediately put my cards on the table. This helps avoid disappointments and expectations. Some might call me selfish, but that's me. I'm single and happy."

 

Annalise, 28 years old, separated,

"If you ask me whether I prefer being single or in a relationship, I am unable to give you an answer right now. My husband and I have been separated for six months, and I am currently enjoying being single again. I was in a six-year long relationship with my ex and, at first, it was not easy to adapt to being single again. When I started going out again, I realised that many people my age are still single and so it was not difficult to enlarge my group of friends.

"But when I return home from work at five in the afternoon and I plan to start cooking, I immediately realise that I am lonely. Evenings are never ending and at times I seriously think of going back to my mother's house. Weekends are a bit better because I go out to meet my friends.

"At the moment I am trying to find my feet, and so I am not looking to engage in a relationship. However, I don't exclude that in the coming future. If I happen to meet a person with whom I could build something new, I would try to give love a second chance. Some of my friends don't agree with me. They say I should be careful and never trust anyone again, but I believe in love and in the stability of being a couple."

Marthese, 47 years old, widowed, single

"I am not single because I chose to be. My husband died two years ago and left me alone with my daughter. I had to assume a dual role, that of a mother and a father at the same time. I have always worked full-time so I definitely have no time to engage in a steady relationship. A few months after my husband died, I started dating a man who was four years younger than I am. At first it worked, but then he got tired of trying to juggle his own life and mine too. I could not go out every single day and I had no intention of making him move in with me. It was too soon. 

"My daughter encourages me to join groups for singles. She will soon turn sixteen and she knows that eventually she will leave and start leading her own life. I miss not having a man in my life but I know that whoever tries to build something with me has to take me on as a whole package. People nowadays are not that ready for commitment. I consider myself old school, and I am not ready to play around. So I will let time take its own course. Whatever will be, will be."

 

A&H SAYS.....

Single, married, complicated - that is the spectrum of relationship statuses posted on social media. Being over thirty and still single was once considered embarrassing. Now it's cool and exciting. Being free - to enjoy life, to explore the world, to do whatever you want whenever you like - appeals to some. Walter represents a new generation of adults who are single by choice. This trend is increasing. Some psychologists say that more and more people remain single to get to know themselves - whenever we are in a relationship, we tend to hide some of our demons, because we are afraid that our partner will judge us and might abandon us.

Annalise still treasures relationships even though she has just experienced a failed one.  This might be put down to a person's character affecting how one views relationships.  People like Annalise want to feel loved, cared for and appreciate the presence of someone else with whom to share their life. Studies confirm that people who are single by choice tend to be more confident in the way they speak, take decisions and stand up for themselves. 

Being in a failed relationship affects a person's mental state. It is useless to keep on trying to fix something broken if the effort is only one-sided. It is normal to feel lost and hurt in the first few months, but your emotional state and overall health will eventually improve. Research shows that bad relationships are directly proportional to an increase in weight. Ending a bad relationship could help you become healthier in more ways than one.

Detoxifying your life can help you detoxify your body and your inner self.  Single people who are confident and who care about themselves tend to eat more healthily and to engage in more physical activity. In turn, a healthy lifestyle boosts one's confidence and self-esteem. It's a smart move all round. Feeling good makes you more likely to make better choices, including whom to trust and share your life with.

If you are a person who wants to make your own rules, avoid getting involved in other people's lives, especially someone who wants to share everything with you and who wants to be part and parcel of your whole life. Build friendships, maintain contact, but be clear and honest about your expectations. It will make things better for everyone.