Has being utterly vile to each other become the new norm? The fundamental ethics such as fairness, mutual respect, honesty, responsibility, emotional intelligence, and tolerance seem to have been replaced at an alarming rate by ignorance, insulting behaviour, violent discourse, and rudeness. This new type of bullying, which is becoming something of a social norm, is spreading like a cancer.

This level of incivility was largely apparent during the last election, and on any post to do with politics and is also reflected in discourteous incidents such as road rage, cutting in the queues, and harassing people on social media. I believe that it is platforms such as Facebook and Twitter that are fanning the flames of this new way of behaving by providing a semi-anonymous space where we can vent our anger, issues, ideas, and in the case of some local commentators, fascist ideals, with little to no repercussions.

Take the recent case of Maltese woman Sara Ezabe – the perfect example of a model citizen, a woman we should aspire to be like, and someone that is deserving of praise. When news of her being included in Forbes 30 under 30 list, instead of being inundated with praise, she was the target of vicious, xenophobic bullies. So much so, she pressed charges against one mindless individual, only to have the court dismiss it. This does not set a good example. What happened to Sara was hate speech and now, more than ever, we should be setting an example of what is free speech, and what is going too far, particularly when it comes to social media.

Now, I am no saint when it comes to being polite on the internet. I have been guilty of resorting to one-word expletives and telling someone what I think of them, but there is a difference between heat of the moment discussion, and systematic, targeted bullying. Of course, being an outspoken, foreign, woman writing about sensitive and controversial issues, I fully expect to be attacked online and in forums but should you go after my family, threaten to rape someone close to me, spread untrue information about me online, or tell me you are going to “debone me one by one”, then you really need to take a good hard look at your life and what you are trying to achieve with it, because that is not normal behaviour.

I take most of these comments with a pinch of salt, as usually they come from fake names and fake profiles, they come from sad individuals who sit at home looking for someone to bully and harass and because there is a computer screen and keyboard separating them from their target, they feel this immense sense of fearlessness. Studies have shown that people who are distanced from each other are less likely to play nice and let us not forget the 1960s’ study that found people were willing to administer electric shocks to a person they couldn’t see, even if they knew it was causing serious pain.

As humans, our brains are so used to communicating face to face, that we are hard-wired to pick up on non-verbal cues such as gestures, facial expressions, tone of voice, and pitch, but when we are online, these cues are removed. You are stripped of many of the methods you use to communicate, and you are left with just words alone. When we are faced with this ambiguity around the context and meaning of a sentence, and are presented with just letters alone, we are more likely to perceive it as a threat and thus, are more likely to react accordingly with little regard for consequences.

But why do people turn into racist, sexist, fascist, pigs on social media? Were people always this way and just had no outlet for it? Or is social media breeding a new type of social degenerate with more extreme views, and fewer qualms about vocalising them? I think it is a combination of all these things. These sad people that bully, stalk, and troll were previously limited in terms of how they could get their kicks. Now they have Facebook and Disqus and can troll away to their hearts content with little to no fallout.

If you don’t know what I am talking about, or you think I am making this up for the sake of a few column inches, I invite you to visit the comments section of any local media on migrants, religion, abortion, LGBTIQ rights, women, gender, crime, politics, or Daphne Caruana Galizia, and I can guarantee you will be shocked. The people that congregate in these places post the most disgusting and hateful things imaginable. I regularly get a ping in my inbox from an international friend who has stumbled across a bit of Maltese news and is utterly stunned at the sort of comments that they have seen.

In my mind, social media has created a whole new ballpark where incivility and intolerance are sanctified virtues, where insularity is the norm, and where ideological diversity must be marginalised and oppressed swiftly and violently. These perpetrators or trolls are nothing but cowards, hiding behind a profile picture of a flag or an inspirational quote, spewing venom and hateful words with no sense of responsibility. They are sadists and narcissists with limited intelligence and sociopathic tendencies and they should not be tolerated.

If you are someone that is a victim of these sorts of people, you can argue back, bombard them with Beyoncé lyrics, or hit the block button, but you can also sit back and be happy in the knowledge that these individuals need to behave like this to fill a void in their otherwise unremarkable lives.

When it comes to the abuse I receive, I am more than capable of standing up for myself, and I consider that I have not done my job as a controversial opinion writer properly unless I get at least 10 complaints and a few threats of violence. But if you are someone that feels glee in the distress of another person then I really feel that you need to reassess your life choices.

We need to renew the emphasis on civil behaviour in schools, at home, and with our government and politics because otherwise this cancer will continue to spread and will fuel a much bigger breakdown of our society. As members of a so-called civilisation, there has never been a more important time to re-establish the need for civility, and this starts with not sending death threats to each other over Facebook.