So soon to be European Commissioner Helena Dalli would have done things differently had she been faced with the double trouble that was the exposure of her theoretical chief of staff Keith Schembri and her chief Minister Konrad Mizzi’s in the Panama Papers.
This is what she told European parliamentarians who were supposedly grilling her on her suitability to form part of the European Commission this week.
But the question is what, exactly, would she have done differently? Would she have treated them with even softer kid gloves had she been their Prime Minister? Would she have sent them to the dungeons, or at least to the stocks?
You see, that she ‘would have done things differently’ is just about as open-ended of a non-answer of a reply that one can give. It is also the kind of answer that is so rehearsed that it just drips choreography.
But the even more pressing question here is why were no more questions asked? We are certain Dr Dalli was braced for more. Why did no one pipe up and ask exactly what she would have done, and in the process allow us Maltese an insight into what at least one of our Ministers of Cabinet actually thought of that whole debacle.
We never knew because ranks were closed quicker than fire doors as soon as things got too uncomfortable for the government’s liking.
One would have imagined that European parliamentarians would have been a little more probing in their line of questioning considering all that has come to pass between the government which Dalli up until not too long ago represented - a government taken to serious task time and time again by their MEP colleagues over this very subject matter - and this hallowed chamber of legislators.
So let us ask the question instead: Dr Dalli, what is that you would have done, exactly?
And in the meantime, both the Prime Minister and Mizzi have been waxing lyrical, opining about how they would have done things differently of they had been given a second chance, if they could just go back in time. This, coupled with the continual protestations of innocence, sounds very much like the character traits of people behind bars rather than running the country.
Again, the Prime Minister neglected to say what, exactly, he would have done differently in those heady days of the Panama Papers revelations if he were to be given the power of time travel and a second chance. And again, it seems that no one asked.
The Prime Minister did, however, praise Helena Dalli for her deft evasion of the million euro question earlier this week and described the ploy as a “legitimate comment”. We are sure he approves, it is the kind of answer that comes straight out of his own playbook.
The Prime Minister’s comment is almost as cynical as Dr Dalli not elaborating on her ‘doing things differently’ quip.
Well, here’s the thing. The Prime Minister can actually set things right and the good news is that he doesn’t even have to go back in time to do it. He could, as is his prerogative as Prime Minister, turn around at any given time and dismiss Mizzi and Schembri and set about atoning for why he had not done so earlier.
This will help in no small measure to put the national humiliation that we have suffered, and which we continue to suffer, to an end once and for all. There is, however, as much a chance of that happening as of Dr Dalli ever saying what she really thought needed to be done with Schembri and Mizzi.