"When I returned to Malta in 2017, the plan was to work as a full-time writer. I put my plan into action the following year and for a while the plan worked. I became my own boss, and I was a harsh boss! I never allowed myself days off, sick days and rarely 

My client base grew slowly but surely. I wrote a TV series, songs, plays and musicals for the theatre and books, both fiction and non. I also directed plays, mentored budding writers, wrote adverts, translated subtitles. You name it and as long as it offered at least a little bit of creativity I did it. Admittedly I wasn't making a hell of a lot of money but at least I was getting by with what I loved doing most. By my 50th birthday I had realised my dream of becoming an independent writer and doing it full time.

The great thing was that I could do my job from wherever I wanted. Sometimes I would write at one of my favourite cafés, or from a hotel or at the beach, or just sitting in my car, looking at the waves coming and going in my pretty village of Marsaskala. I could have my coffee breaks and lunch break when and where I wanted. I was living the life, as they say. It would be rare for anyone to see me without a smile.

And then my dog died and my relationship ended and I was heartbroken. The freedom to do what I wanted when I wanted turned into a nightmare of sorts because without a steady regime I felt lost. Instead of loving my own company I suddenly felt lonely. Christmas 2019 was horrible. I watched films like The Holiday and cried. I even watched Home Alone and cried. I was a mess.

Simon’s cat Whisky and his bestseller, Il-Kreatura tal-Bir

At the beginning of 2020 I scraped myself off the floor, joined my favourite choir and enrolled in a part-time university course. I was certain that these things would help because I would be singing and studying again and I'd be making new friends. But then, after just a few rehearsals and a handful of lectures Covid-19 happened and like everybody else I was forced into lockdown.

Those months were gruesome. I was one of those people who was absolutely terrified of the virus. To be totally honest it still scares me a lot. I became distracted and listless but I still had to follow through with the course I'd started and paid for. All of a sudden lectures were conducted online with something called Zoom which by now, like almost everyone, I'm not just very familiar with but also kind of sick of.

I'd barely had the time to get to know the people in my course before this happened. And yet we formed a WhatsApp group and discussed all things course related, but not only. Since most of us were stuck at home, we got to know each other pretty well, even though we couldn't remember what most of the others look like. We became friends and helped each other out with anything from exams to bereavement to recipes and beyond. We chatted about how we'd love to travel again, about the things that we missed, and also about boring administrative stuff like the complex process of applying online for things like a tax refund on our course fee.

Recording the song Tifkiriet in 2018

What had started as a dream job/life for me a mere two years before, quickly turned sour with the closure of the theatres, etc. Who'd have told me that I'd be applying for government Covid supplements in order to make ends meet? I finally bowed to the pressure of starting to search for a job.

I don't think I want to go back to teaching or lecturing. I did that for ten years and I loved it but it kind of feels like a closed chapter now. I could do translations but I'd want to go back to Luxembourg or Brussels for that. So I looked for something beyond those two fields. And I finally found something that I think I like, or at least that I think I'm willing to do without frowning - I'm going to be working in the banking sector!

All my friends were obviously very surprised when I told them this but somehow, when I saw the post in the daily email that I get from Jobsplus, it kind of made sense to apply. Fingers crossed I'll be happy there. I'm already excited just to have colleagues again. And what's more, my training starts on Valentine's day, so it must be the beginning of a love story, right? We'll see."

This series is conceived and edited by Marie Benoît who contributes her own Diary occasionally. [email protected]