You may have read about, or heard people mention the fight or flight response, or even recall moments in your life when you experienced such reactions. The fight or flight response can be explained as an evolutionary mechanism designed to help us survive threatening situations. Think of an animal living in the wild and hearing a sound which may very well be a predator. The fight/flight system allows animals to immediately respond to the threat, their bodies releasing hormones, accelerating their heart rate and mobilising the body to survive threat or attack. Obviously, as human beings, we're unlikely to encounter a sabre tooth tiger in our daily lives. However, we face different kinds of threats such as deadlines, full inboxes, work targets, road traffic and non-stop demands on our time and attention. Prolonged stress, as well as unresolved trauma or abuse, can result in a person operating and living in survival mode.
So, how can you tell you're in survival mode? If you notice you've been experiencing the below symptoms for some time, it may be a sign you're in survival mode:
- Feeling constantly stressed
- Poor eating habits
- Issues sleeping
- Difficulty making decisions
- Poor short-term memory
- Mood swings
- Lack of motivation
- Feeling numb or detached
- Difficulty relaxing or switching off
- Frequent feelings of anxiety - upset stomach, palpitations, shallow breathing or difficulty breathing
Survival mode is a prolonged stress response which results in your nervous system becoming dysregulated. Our nervous system is made up of two branches, the sympathetic nervous system (SNS) and the parasympathetic nervous system (PSNS). The sympathetic nervous system springs into action when there's a sign of threat, mobilising the body for fight or flight. Here you'll see pupils dilate, your heartbeat accelerating and blood pressure increasing. The parasympathetic nervous system, on the other hand, helps us to reach a more relaxed state, managing our organs and bodies to allow us to feel calm and safe.
Prolonged stress can cause one or both of these systems to over-function, meaning that survival mode can manifest differently for different people. Someone who's frequently on edge, anxious and hypervigilant, may have a dominant sympathetic nervous system. On the other hand, someone who's often detached, feeling low, lacking in energy and drive, may have an overactive parasympathetic nervous system, that is, prolonged stress or trauma may have caused them to shut down for self-protection or survival. Traumatic events, such as an assault or an accident, may trigger someone to enter survival mode. People with PTSD (post-traumatic stress disorder) have a dysregulated sympathetic nervous system, for instance, leaving them constantly reacting to external or internal stimuli such as a loud noise, particular feeling, etc. with a fight or flight reaction. Survival mode may also be triggered by extended periods of stress, such as overworking without engaging in self-care or enduring an unhealthy or abusive relationship for an extended period.
If you resonated with the above and are now concerned you may be living in survival mode, it's important to know that there is light at the end of the tunnel and something you can do to thrive rather than just survive. Here is some guidance on what you can do if you're stuck in survival mode:
- Face reality - You don't need to keep putting on a brave face or denying that you're struggling. Instead, it's time to accept that you're not thriving or living the healthiest, most satisfying life you could live.
- Identify triggers or sources of stress - For instance, are you working too many hours? does reading the news cause anxiety? are you spending too much time on devices? Once you identify triggers, you can start trying to reduce them.
- Practice self-compassion - Think about how you'd treat or speak to someone you care about and do the same for yourself. Be kind, loving and understanding towards yourself.
- Figure out whether you're stuck in sympathetic nervous system activation or parasympathetic nervous system activation, or both - If it's the former, you'll need to practise calming techniques, such as deep breathing, meditation, soothing self-talk, etc. If you tend to be detached, low, lacking motivation, or desensitised, indicating that your parasympathetic nervous system is overactive, it would be useful to do activities involving the body and movement, deep breathing techniques, mindfulness, physical touch (for example, hugs, massage) and guided meditation.
- Create structure and routine - This reduces chaos and help you feel more organised and in control of your day.
- Practice self-care - This doesn't mean rewarding hard work with a monthly spa day but ensuring you get enough sleep, giving yourself breaks, doing things you enjoy, creating boundaries and eating a balanced, healthy diet.
- Reach out to someone you trust - Feeling supported and connected to people around you can go a long way towards helping you manage difficult emotions.
- Seek professional help - If you've experienced trauma or you've been dealing with chronic stress for some time, speaking to a professional is essential to process and heal from whatever you've experienced, as well as helping you manage stress and learn new coping skills.
It's important to note that, if you are feeling stuck in survival mode, chances are you've been in this state for some time. Therefore, the process of becoming unstuck is unlikely to be a quick one, so please be patient with yourself and do reach out for professional help if symptoms are severe or if you would simply like some guidance and support.