In a dazzling display of bureaucratic theatre, the Maltese government recently celebrated the signing of an agreement between two of its own entities to clean roads outside of peak traffic hours.

Yes, really.

With all the pomp usually reserved for peace treaties or historic international accords, a minister and a parliamentary secretary stood proudly at the Public Service Expo 2025, bearing witness as Transport Malta and the Cleansing and Maintenance Division solemnly put pen to paper. The subject of their historic collaboration? Not transport innovation, not a new infrastructure project, but the simple notion that sweeping busy streets during rush hour might not be the wisest move.

Enter stage left: Transport Minister Chris Bonett, extolling the complexity and gravitas of this document. "These types of agreements are not always easy to reach," he said solemnly, as if they'd just finished negotiating the Treaty of Versailles and not a basic schedule change between two government bodies.

And just when you thought the curtain might fall there, in came Parliamentary Secretary Glenn Bedingfield to echo the sentiment. "This agreement clearly demonstrates the government's coordinated efforts to enhance people's quality of life," he declared, with a straight face.

What's next? A signing ceremony for switching off office lights when everyone goes home?

The absurdity here isn't the decision itself - which, let's be honest, is perfectly reasonable. Of course it makes sense not to block major roads with slow-moving cleaning vehicles when the country is collectively trying to get to work or school. No sane person would argue otherwise.

The problem is that it took a full-blown agreement, involving government CEOs, PR teams, media coverage, and no doubt a healthy stack of taxpayer-funded man-hours, to reach a conclusion that most five-year-olds could come to in under ten seconds.

Surely this could have been sorted with a quick meeting, a phone call, or even a casual text exchange - "Hey, let's move sweeping to 10am?" Thumbs up emoji. Done. Efficient, fast, and mercifully free of press releases.

But that's not how things are done when there's an opportunity to posture. In the great tradition of state pageantry, any semblance of common sense must be dressed up in a parade of press statements, official signings, and photo ops designed to manufacture a sense of importance. Because heaven forbid we let a practical decision pass quietly when it can be inflated into a "strategic milestone".

But here's the kicker: while the ink was still drying, commuters across Malta were already gritting their teeth in morning traffic jams worsened not by cleaners, but by the perennial mismanagement of road closures, pointless detours, and sudden roadworks that appear like potholes after a heavy rain.

So while the government beams with pride over its off-peak cleaning breakthrough, the average driver is left wondering how much of a dent this will really make if traffic planning continues to be driven by chaos and wishful thinking.

Will roads still be randomly closed without notice? Will multiple projects continue to start at once in the same town, grinding everything to a halt? Will we keep having moments where an entire stretch of road is coned off for one man to smoke a cigarette next to a wheelbarrow? Will we still have main arteries blocked while village feasts are taking place?

These are the real questions. Because cleaning at better times is welcome, sure - but if we're still funnelling thousands of cars through poorly signposted, one-lane zigzags for no apparent reason, what's the point? And if detours send drivers to other detours then it's of no use at all to have street sweeping at 10am.

And that brings us to the larger issue: this initiative is being touted under the government's banner of "Reshaping Our Mobility". If this is what "reshaping" looks like, it's more akin to rearranging deck chairs on a gridlocked ferry. The real reshaping Malta needs is smarter urban planning, more transparent infrastructure timelines, and - dare we say it - actual consequences for poor project coordination.

Again, no one's arguing against better timing for cleaning. But please - save us the pageantry. Agreements between agencies that fall under the same government umbrella shouldn't require a ribbon-cutting ceremony and a full PR rollout. That's just bureaucracy patting itself on the back with both hands.

So here's a wild idea for free: next time, just clean the roads when there's less traffic without the ceremonial fanfare. Or better yet - manage road closures properly, coordinate infrastructure works intelligently, and maybe, just maybe, Malta's traffic nightmare won't need a commemorative plaque every time someone uses common sense.

Malta doesn't need symbolic gestures wrapped in bureaucratic fanfare. It needs practical, sustained action. Until that happens, all the grandstanding in the world won't clear the roads - or the public's growing frustration.