The Malta Independent on Sunday’s annual board game parody takes us, once again, on a nostalgic trip down memory lane: Monopoly, the game that, at least in part, defined the childhood of many of us. 

Many of us, in fact, learned our first lessons in big business from the Monopoly board. Who, after all, has never been engrossed in the utter megalomania that the game fosters? Who, at one point or another during those games, has never tried to strike a shifty side deal, swapping properties or cash with a neighbouring player? Who, away from the banker’s ever-watchful eye, never contemplated plundering some of the cash?

Most of us are guilty of all of the above and some perhaps of far worse, as we huddled around the old Monopoly board on many a cold winter’s night.

For many who cut their business teeth on the game’s streets, that was only the beginning: they have made a career of transposing those Monopoly lessons into real life.

The game itself has stood the test of time and has changed little since its first version – the purchase of properties, the construction of houses and hotels and ruthless business acumen are, after all, similarly timeless. 

Government administrations have a whole new take on the game but some of the main components remain the same: the megalomania, the shifty deals and the plundering of the ‘bank’ – all done in the interests of personal or partisan gain, or in an effort to buy votes and political campaign support.

As such, we have taken the liberty, in a reflection of the times, to redub this age-old classic ‘Votopoly’.

Much of this year’s political machinations have centred on the government’s property wheelings and dealings. While some politicians have been the direct beneficiaries, some have been the benefactors – dispensing public land and properties at questionable prices in return for eternal loyalty in the form of votes.

Looking back at some of this year’s dealings, it becomes more than evident that some of the country’s most precious assets – the very little land it has left and the country’s patrimony – have been going, time and time again, to the highest bidder.

We have had a government selling a vast amount of land in Marsascala clearly labelled as being outside development zone for the construction of a private educational venture and we have seen half of the historic Dock 1 turned over to the same business venture.

We have had the €4.2 million Café Premier scandal, the government’s ongoing nightmare on Old Mint Street – over which Parliamentary Secretary Michael Falzon is facing repeated calls to resign, the Australia Hall sleight of hand that saw a public property worth millions being handed over to the party in government, and PS Ian Borg and Minister Helena Dalli both having been embroiled in controversy over their private property developments.

In a country the size of Malta, we all know that property comes at a premium. But so do certain public assets that enjoy considerable market shares and as such there are considerable spoils to be had. 

For starters, the lion’s share of the country’s electricity provision has been farmed out to the private sector, to the Electrogas operation of the new Delimara power station. At least a large stake of Air Malta, once vaunted as an indispensable public asset, is being sold to a strategic partner. The public transportation service, which admittedly was never a huge money-spinner, has been farmed out to the private sector for the second time but the contract has never been published.

There is also the upcoming Malta-Gozo tunnel project, the beneficiaries of which are still unknown – at least to the public. Bank of Valletta, another valuable state asset, is facing accusations of having been used and abused by the government on at least two occasions: over PS Michael Falzon’s early retirement deal and its involvement in the financing of the Electrogas deal.

Making matters worse still, Identity Malta, a relatively new state institution, has been heavily implicated in questionably issuing thousands of Schengen visas for Algerians and close to 1,000 illegal residency permits for Libyan nationals in the Joe Sammut residencies-for cash-scandal, which is currently before the courts.

Add to that the passports-for-cash scheme and any casual observer of Malta will wonder whether they are looking at a first or third-world country.

We’ve also seen two former ministers resign this year – one on works-for-votes accusations and the other for accepting favours from another person involved in a number of scandals. We have had a government MP resign from the party over, in part, the land deal for the private educational facility and in part over the government’s intention to take almost total control of the country’s planning processes.

The fact that we were spoilt for choice on what to include on our Votopoly board, as opposed to being left scratching our heads as to how to fill each box, speaks volumes.

We are now well past the halfway mark of this legislature, and the great game of Malta’s Votopoly can only be expected to pick up tempo between now and the next general election. The more experienced Votopoly players already have their plans well-laid – while the rest of us will just have to keep rolling the dice and hoping for the best.