A lot has been written and reported about the use of contraception, the need for better sex education and the role of Personal and Social Development (PSD) teachers in imparting this information to students during their formative years.

In everything that has been said, however, one important aspect seems to be overlooked, or rather, not stressed as much as it should be. For all their eagerness to experiment with their sexuality, young teenagers should constantly be reminded that there are emotional and psychological implications of having sex at too young an age.

It is not enough to merely teach them ‘where babies come from’ or the perils of sexually transmitted diseases, or the huge responsibilities which come with an unexpected pregnancy.

Boys and girls under 16 are simply not ready to handle the complex range of feelings and jumbled mixture of emotions which arise after sexual intercourse. Girls, especially, are often pressured into sex because of peer pressure and the belief that ‘everybody’s doing it’. They might fear that not having sex with their boyfriend will mean he will break up with them, so they give in to this pressure often against their better judgement. Boys, on the other hand, are often taunted by their friends for the same reason, and while their hormones might make them think they are ready – mentally, they are just as immature as girls, if not more so.

Sexual experimentation at too young an age often leads to a warped view of what sex really means, and can and often does, affect one’s relationships in later life. If sexual education is left simply on the level of the physical aspect of the issue, and its possible repercussions on their health, teenagers will easily dismiss any risks as teenagers often do: “it will never happen to me”.

However, if during classroom discussions, the topic is also taken within the context of what becoming sexually active really means to them, it will allow teenagers a space in which they can examine their real motives for wanting to lose their virginity at such a young age. While we are sure that some PSD teachers do delve into this matter, perhaps it is time to ensure that everyone who teaches this subject, and indeed anyone who is in contact with young teenagers, explores this issue in depth with them.

Let us not forget that parents too have a duty and obligation to speak openly with their children about how having sex for the first time will affect them. This is not the time for being prude or embarrassed to speak about this subject with one’s teenagers, for if parents are not willing to be honest with them, they will look for information elsewhere. We live in an age when sex is thrown at us from every medium available, from advertising to music videos to variety programmes and even situation comedies. People casually slip in and out of bed with different partners even in shows which are supposedly considered ‘family entertainment’.

The message from the media is that having sex is no big deal. But actually, it is a big deal in a young person’s life, and that is why teachers and parents have the moral responsibility to speak frankly with young teenagers.